Issue # 51
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I hope your holidays were as ... ahem... interesting as mine were :-)
() Personal stuff
Amy and I could stay home for another three weeks with no problem, but come Monday we'll be looking for a load.
We got all of our DOC appointments over with and it looks like we'll both live for another year :-)
Amy is starting the count down until we get off the road, just 16 more months ( I won't give you the day or hour count) til we become normal townies again. We'll both be looking for new
jobs. I'm definitely looking for something in the 'puter industry. A help desk or tech support job is probably what would be best for me. So if any of you either own/run or work
somewhere that could use my skills and wonderful personality (g), please let me know. As for a resume, have them look at this website. I don't know what Amy wants to do yet :-)
I've wiped and reinstalled Win9x on a total of 11 'puters during this vacation... it's a new record for me... and no, they weren't all mine either :-)
() Virus problems
We've all read about virus problems. Some of us have gotten viruses. But I wanted to talk about them in a different way.
It used to be about the only way to get a virus was from a virus infected floppy disk. Then it was from downloads off the web. Then came "Word" macro viruses. Today it's
Until we came home for vacation I had only gotten infected by a virus once. It was from a download long ago. As of today I have received 5 virus infected email attachments since the
15th of Dec. The simple answer here is to not open any attachments unless you're expecting them. Even if they come from someone you know... delete them! A virus CAN send emails with
I'd like to strongly suggest that you practice safe email :-) Don't send ANYONE an attachment without clearing it with the recipient. Do NOT open any email attachments from anyone
unless you're expecting it. By doing this, you'll get others to do the same.
I always delete emails with attachments even if I know them. Then when the person who sent it asks about it or asks why I never responded I tell them the facts. Now anyone who knows
me always asks if it's OK to send an attachment to me.
Personally I like and use Norton Antivirus. It will scan emails before you get them. It caught all of the infected attachments. I've been told from many sources that you can
now get a virus from a HTML email as well. I have never gotten one but this is just another reason to only use "plain text" unless it's really needed. I wish Outlook Express had a
setting to refuse HTML emails, if it did I would turn it on. I hate HTML emails. They're too bulky, and people seem to pick font colors that are hard to read.
() About PuterGeek.Com
A number of small minor changes have been made to the website. Three changes have been made to the header and footer of almost every page. Can any of you name all three
changes? If you think you can email me at email@example.com
with a subject of "Changes". I'll list all the names of those (if any) that
got it right in the next newsletter. Since this newsletter is free, I can't afford any prizes... sorry.
There's a new Poll up at http://www.putergeek.com/index.shtml#poll
Please take a moment and vote. This poll will
determine if I'll convert some of the pages into PDF files and make them available for download or not.
There are two new pages up now! The first one is "Home Networking Part Two"
I put off creating this page for too long. many of you have asked for it, and I'm sorry it took so long for me to write it. I think it turned out very well, but you're the
judge! Please tell me if you think it's a good page or not. It prints out to around 25 pages so be warned. It is a slow loading page due to all the screenshots. It totals
almost 400K all together. The first two screens don't have any images so by the time you read to the first image the whole page should be loaded.
Before any of you email me...hehe... I will not break up big pages and make 10 little pages out of them. I find nothing bugs me worse than read, click, wait, read, click, wait, and so
on. Plus can you imagine trying to print such a page? This way the page will continue to load while you're reading it. The big sites do it so you'll see more ads.... and that's not
the way I do things at PuterGeek.Com!
Take a look and see if you agree or disagree with me.
() Do the PuterGeek a favor
For those of you that like my website and or my newsletter, for those who have found help from me via email or by phone, I'd like to ask a favor of you. Now you can help me :-)
PuterGeek.Com has been mentioned 4 times on the Langalist but NEVER in Lockergnome! I'd like to try and change that. If you agree, and only if you feel others should hear about
PuterGeek.Com, please click on the following link and take a couple of minutes to fill out Chris Pirillo's form. Maybe if enough of you fill out the form he'll mention the site. He hasn't
responded favorably to the email I've sent him.
() Now on with the good stuff!
Top Ten Things To Say About a Christmas Gift You Don't Like...
10. Hey! Now there's a gift!
9. Well, well, well...
8. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes that would've fit.
7. This is perfect for wearing around the basement.
6. Gosh. I hope this never catches fire! It is fire season though.
There are lots of unexplained fires.
5. If the dog buries it, I'll be furious!
4. I love it - but I fear the jealousy it will inspire.
3. Sadly, tomorrow I enter the Federal Witness Protection Program.
2. To think I got this the year I vowed to give all my gifts to charity.
1. I really don't deserve this.
I honor my personality flaws, for without them -
I would have no personality at all.
Joan of Arc heard voices too.
I will find humor in my everyday life
by looking for people I can laugh at.
Q: How big is big? Is it bigger than large, for example? Is it a relative
term, and if so, relative to what?
A: Big is larger than large, but not as big as huge. Huge is bigger than
large and big, but not as huge as humungous. Huge is like a big large,
but larger. Humungous is bigger than huge or large, and even larger than
ample. Ample is hardly very big at all, but it's still big, bigger than small,
at any rate.
Tech Support: "Ok, why don't you turn off error control and see if that clears the problem up."
Customer: "Turn off AIR control? What the heck is AIR control??"
Tech Support: "Customer Support, this is David, may I help you?"
Customer: "Hello, yes, it's me."
Tech Support: "Oh, it's me too." [chuckle]
Customer: "No, Esmie. E, s, m, i, e."
Tech Support: "Oh, sorry."
Tech Support: "Type 'fix' with an 'f'."
Customer: "Is that 'f' as in 'fix'?"
Tech Support: "Are you reading an error message to me?"
Customer: "No, I'm reading an error message to you."
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
(NOTE: This has happened to me - Peter)
Customer: "I get this error when I check my mail. It says, 'There are no new messages.'"
Customer: "I tried sending email to 1.404.123.4567 but the emailer wouldn't let me."
Tech Support: "Um, that's a telephone number."
Tech Support: "How may I help you?"
Customer: "I'm writing my first email."
Tech Support: "Ok, what seems to be the problem?"
Customer: "Well I can get the 'a'. But how do I put the circle around it?"
Customer: "I can't get my email."
Tech Support: "What software are you using?"
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech Support: (sigh) "What do you get your email on?"
Customer: "My computer."
Thanks to subscriber Evaeline in Holland for pointing this site out to me!
Another Way To Get At Windows Update
In a recent issue, we covered some workarounds to try if you're unable
to access Microsoft's "Windows Update" site:
Some people get erroneous error messages stating that "Your
organization has decided to provide software updates internally rather
than through Windows Update. To download updates for your Windows
computer, please see your Network Administrator." Or "Windows Update
was disabled by your System Administrator." (See
Reader Kenneth Harris found a simpler fix than the one listed in the
Fred-- This problem happened to me also, and without any
reason. I did refer to the Microsoft Knowledge Base
articles, but while they gave possible explanations and
cures, they didn't work for me. Finally, some kind person in
a Windows newsgroup gave me this solution
Use Start/Run and enter this: regsvr32 wupdinfo.dll
Note there is a space between the 32 and the w
Worked like a charm--haven't had the problem since!
Quick Reader Tip
Ever have a "Duh!" moment? I sure have. For example, I was surprised a
few months ago when I was told that if you enter any word in the IE
address bar and then hit Ctrl-Enter, IE will automatically prepend the
." and append the ".com" for you. Note that this is
different from the search function, where you enter any word and hit
enter. Rather than searching for sites, this Ctrl-Enter trick is
simply a way to rapidly complete URLs. I never knew that. Duh!
This week, Diana Hudson offers another little time-saver:
Do you know that a shortcut to change the size of your
browser's font without going through clicking View, text
size and so on? If you are using a mouse with roller in the
middle, press "ctrl" and roll the mouse roller up or down
and your browser's font will change almost instantly.
Thanks, Diana. I never knew that, either. Duh!
Before this issue gets too long, I better present this item from
reader Win Gray; it points out that when it comes to verbiage, less
often is more:
Pythagorean theorem: 24 words
The Lord's Prayer: 66 words.
Archimedes' Principle: 67 words.
The 10 Commandments: 179 words.
Lincoln's Gettysburg address: 286 words.
The U.S. Declaration of Independence: 1,300 words.
The U.S. Government regulations on the sale of cabbage:
** Just a Reminder**
Super Bowl DotCom Kiss of Death?
"The Super Bowl 2001 will not see the dotcom ad orgy of last year - mainly
because many of the outfits that splashed out on the event have become
dotcom dodos in the interim.
Just three dotcoms have so far coughed up the necessary $2.5 million for one
of the 30-second spots on CBS in this month's football fest - E-Trade, jobs
sites Monster.com (going for its Super Bowl ad hat-trick this year) and
Hotjobs.com. E-Trade is going all out - it is sponsoring the Super Bowl XXXV
half-time show for the second consecutive year, while all 66,321 audience
bottoms in the stadium will be resting on cushions emblazoned with the
financial site's logo.
Other dotcoms have not been so lucky - of the 17 technology or Internet
companies that bought ad space for Super Bowl XXXIV, seven have gone out of
business. These include Pets.com and Computers.com."
Quote of the day!
"Men are like fine wine. They all start out like
grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep
them in the dark until they mature into something
which you'd like to have dinner with." - Anonymous
One of the ballyhooed features of recent Netscape
versions has been the What's Related search. When you
browse to a Web site, Navigator automatically sends
information to Netscape about where you are, and in
turn Netscape sends back some search results of
related sites. This is handy for quick changes to
other sites with a similar theme, but what if you
don't like anyone knowing what you're doing? To turn
off this feature, follow these steps:
1. Open Edit, Preferences.
2. Choose Navigator.
3. Choose Smart Browsing.
4. Click to remove the checkmark from the Enable
What's Related box.
Are you sick of making the same resolutions year after
year that you never keep?
Why not promise to do something you can actually accomplish?
Here are some resolutions that you can use as a starting point:
1. I want to gain weight. Put on at least 30 pounds.
2. Stop exercising. Waste of time.
3. Read less.
4. Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.
5. Procrastinate more.
6. Drink. Drink some more.
7. Take up a new habit: maybe smoking.
8. Spend more time at work.
9. Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.
10. Start being superstitious.
11. Spend more time in chat.
Top ten things men know about women:
3. Let me think...
10. They have breasts. Hehehehe
LIGHTWEIGHT WIRELESS HEADSET
In the privacy of your own home, of course, talking to yourself is
not necessarily a sign of anything sinister. At least, that's what I
always say when there's no one else around.
ArialPhone this week introduced a one-ounce wireless headset that
connects with your telephone and your computer. The idea is that the
headset hangs on your ear and communicates with a base station over a
900MHz spread-spectrum frequency band. The base station is plugged
into your computer and your telephone.
If you use Outlook or Outlook Express, the company promises, you can
take the gadget out of the box and order your computer to, for
instance, "Call Dan Rosenbaum" without any special training. Drivers
for contact managers are promised.
The ArialPhone has a range of about 150 feet, a Li-Ion battery with a
2 to 3- hour life, and a list price of $399 when it ships in the
second quarter of this year.
Multimedia Tool: To Remove Shockwave Registry Keys
This fix is for Microsoft Encarta 2000 / 2001, Picture It! Photo 2001, and Picture It! Publishing 2001. "When you start any of these Microsoft programs, you may experience any of the following
symptoms: the Welcome movie may not play; when you click Get Creative Ideas, the page may not be built; helpful movies may not play. This behavior can occur if Macromedia Shockwave is damaged. To
resolve this issue, use the following methods in the order in which they are presented. NOTE: To follow these steps, you must have Macromedia Shockwave version 8.0 or later installed on your
computer." The patch is available for download here (release Date: Dec-15-2000).
Money 2001: Obtain the Quicken File Converter
"Money 2001 Standard is ideal for managing the day-to-day financial tasks of banking, bill paying, budgeting, tracking expenses and managing basic investments. Money 2001 Deluxe is right for you
if, in addition to day-to-day financial tasks, you want to set and plan for long-term financial goals and manage complex investments. If you are a sole proprietor, you need Money 2001 Deluxe &
Business-which includes everything in Money 2001 Deluxe plus powerful tools for managing business tasks. Money 2001's improved Money Setup Assistant asks a series of simple questions to walk you
through identifying what's important to you, setting up new accounts, entering recurring bills and deposits, enabling online accounts, and personalizing Money 2001."
() That's all for now!
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Last Revised: 01/05/2001